Sunday, July 05, 2009
Very Spooky!
HE DIDN'T REALLY DIE! HE WILL MOONWALK OUT OF A CASKET AND PUT ON A SHOW! JUST YOU WAIT!
Friday, July 03, 2009
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Leather Bra
I am featured in this month's INTERVIEW in a slutty outfit (as seen above) as one of the "Young Artists of New York" (WHAT?!)
I am very proud of this article because I feel like they actually published everything I said to them and didn't make me sound like an idiot! Go out and get INTERVIEW! There is a really great article on the Mayan calendar and the end of the world!! It would be so annoying if the world ended in 2012 - all this worrying for nothing!
(Thanks to Court Shop for creepily scanning these photos! Ooh lala!)
Baby Faces
They only make these in throw pillows but don't you think they would be so cool as curtains?
Do You Believe in Life After ... Pleet TV?
My friend, designer Samantha Pleet invited me onto her special show, PleetTV, along with my babiegurgle Peggy and some other unusual characters.
Samantha's show PleetTV by WeMakeItGood is really wacky in the best way, and I hope you like my Cher impression. Why are my cheeks so shiny? Want to cYbEr?
Samantha's show PleetTV by WeMakeItGood is really wacky in the best way, and I hope you like my Cher impression. Why are my cheeks so shiny? Want to cYbEr?
Sunday, June 28, 2009
"Cool" Things I Always Wish I Liked But Could Never Get Into..
Because I hate loud noises and large crowds, I guess I am destined to be an uncultured loner. Here is a list of things that "cool people" seem to think are really great but I just can't get into, for various reasons... and I am totally okay with this!
Give me a DVD of Housewives of NY and a bag of Dipsy Doodles over any of this stuff, any day!
---
Twin Peaks*, the series
-is this show supposed to be like Northern Exposure but spookier?
I've tried to watch it but I don't get it.
"Blue Velvet"*
-i fell asleep during this movie and woke up at the point where someone crazy is yelling "We all drink Pabst Blue Ribbon!!!", and all i could think of was what a good marketing technique of PBR it was to get a "shout out" in this movie! it's like the hipster doofus equivalent of Fergie talking about "Candies shoes" in her songs and getting paid like $ 2 million dollars... I wonder if in the movie they had been like "We all drink Smirnoff Ice!!!", would it be at every little doofus social event instead? Do you remember when "Nantucket Nectars" was in every rap song? I do!
The Ramones*
-i don't like or dislike them because honestly, i am not even sure what they sing. i just think of that photo in front of Guitar Center on 14th street - it's a photo of all of them, like this one above, but middle age, leaning against a brick wall, with tight jeans. I guess I need to read some books or something on all the "hits" they've made and how they were the first band to do something rebellious, but honestly, everything I've heard by them sounds like drunk people yelling...
jazz music*
i know this is completely in another vein but i don't like jazz or appreciate it. to me it sounds like "musical diarrhea". i especially hate the sound of a saxophone. i feel like the only person who benefits from the sound of a saxophone is the person playing it. if i tell people this, they'll be like "oh, well you need to hear good jazz" - so then i go online and listen to "good jazz" and i still think it sounds like a fast explosion of wet farts after an impulsive trip to Taco Bell, but in musical note form.
On a side note, why do movies play saxophones during "sexy scenes" - it is the WORST!
Sonic Youth*
-again, this is one of those bands i have tried to like, but just can't! i wish i could buy one of those totebags with the french detective looking girl on it (i think that's what it is?), and carry organic vegetables in it and be like "yeah, i've seen them live 43 times" but i just don't. i don't get it. once i saw accidentally went to a speech by Thurston Moore on how "NYC has changed" and it was pretty boring and I just kept staring at Kim Gordon wondering if she ever secretly picks her nose and eats it.
riding a bike*
-i am fine to ride a bike in a small town for maybe 12 minutes, downhill, with a helmet on - but to ride as a form of transportation in a city? that seems crazy to me! it just seems like such a scary time to worry about getting run over at night, and have to deal with filling up tires, and having to lock it up so you can leave it parked outside somewhere just to get a bottle of Vitamin Water? i'd rather speed walk (with a helmet on).
punk music* (in general)
(is this person famous? i'm not even sure...)
-Is there a coincidence with noisy things being cool? Is it cool to hurt your eardrums? Or to be self-destructive in general? I guess it is cool to be a "risk taker" and the thought of going to a punk concert with ugly sweaty people with point hair seems quite risky in my book. Do people listen to punk on headphones? it all sounds like yelling ...
Misfits*
This band seems very spooky and cool to like! i like that song "Attitude", sort of - does that give me street cred? i don't know... i feel like i wish i liked them , because i think it would be fun to be a 17 year old outcast girl in some far away mall suburb, who goes to punky house parties and has a faded black Misfits hooded sweatshirt, and tries to get into fights with other girls who she thinks are "high-maintenance" but somehow narrowly avoids ever fighting them, but is still thought of as "tough"..
cigarettes*
i don't mean "smoking them", i just mean standing outside in a place people are smoking.
but i do think it would be so fun to have something to do outside and a reason to ask handsome boys if you can "bum a cig" or whatever - i'm sure a lot of wrinkled couples have met that way.
Brunch*
(and/or going out to eat with a group of people in general)
What is the point of going to brunch? Not only do you never actually talk to all the people you are sitting with, but then you have to split a really big bill at the end - and of course there is always someone who is going to "forget" that order of "bruschetta" or whatever they ordered that you didn't even get a bite of, and then you're stuck handing over a $20 bill for a $5.95 bowl of black bean soup...
Okay, that's enough for this morning... Have a good day!
Give me a DVD of Housewives of NY and a bag of Dipsy Doodles over any of this stuff, any day!
---
Twin Peaks*, the series
-is this show supposed to be like Northern Exposure but spookier?
I've tried to watch it but I don't get it.
"Blue Velvet"*
-i fell asleep during this movie and woke up at the point where someone crazy is yelling "We all drink Pabst Blue Ribbon!!!", and all i could think of was what a good marketing technique of PBR it was to get a "shout out" in this movie! it's like the hipster doofus equivalent of Fergie talking about "Candies shoes" in her songs and getting paid like $ 2 million dollars... I wonder if in the movie they had been like "We all drink Smirnoff Ice!!!", would it be at every little doofus social event instead? Do you remember when "Nantucket Nectars" was in every rap song? I do!
The Ramones*
-i don't like or dislike them because honestly, i am not even sure what they sing. i just think of that photo in front of Guitar Center on 14th street - it's a photo of all of them, like this one above, but middle age, leaning against a brick wall, with tight jeans. I guess I need to read some books or something on all the "hits" they've made and how they were the first band to do something rebellious, but honestly, everything I've heard by them sounds like drunk people yelling...
jazz music*
i know this is completely in another vein but i don't like jazz or appreciate it. to me it sounds like "musical diarrhea". i especially hate the sound of a saxophone. i feel like the only person who benefits from the sound of a saxophone is the person playing it. if i tell people this, they'll be like "oh, well you need to hear good jazz" - so then i go online and listen to "good jazz" and i still think it sounds like a fast explosion of wet farts after an impulsive trip to Taco Bell, but in musical note form.
On a side note, why do movies play saxophones during "sexy scenes" - it is the WORST!
Sonic Youth*
-again, this is one of those bands i have tried to like, but just can't! i wish i could buy one of those totebags with the french detective looking girl on it (i think that's what it is?), and carry organic vegetables in it and be like "yeah, i've seen them live 43 times" but i just don't. i don't get it. once i saw accidentally went to a speech by Thurston Moore on how "NYC has changed" and it was pretty boring and I just kept staring at Kim Gordon wondering if she ever secretly picks her nose and eats it.
riding a bike*
-i am fine to ride a bike in a small town for maybe 12 minutes, downhill, with a helmet on - but to ride as a form of transportation in a city? that seems crazy to me! it just seems like such a scary time to worry about getting run over at night, and have to deal with filling up tires, and having to lock it up so you can leave it parked outside somewhere just to get a bottle of Vitamin Water? i'd rather speed walk (with a helmet on).
punk music* (in general)
(is this person famous? i'm not even sure...)
-Is there a coincidence with noisy things being cool? Is it cool to hurt your eardrums? Or to be self-destructive in general? I guess it is cool to be a "risk taker" and the thought of going to a punk concert with ugly sweaty people with point hair seems quite risky in my book. Do people listen to punk on headphones? it all sounds like yelling ...
Misfits*
This band seems very spooky and cool to like! i like that song "Attitude", sort of - does that give me street cred? i don't know... i feel like i wish i liked them , because i think it would be fun to be a 17 year old outcast girl in some far away mall suburb, who goes to punky house parties and has a faded black Misfits hooded sweatshirt, and tries to get into fights with other girls who she thinks are "high-maintenance" but somehow narrowly avoids ever fighting them, but is still thought of as "tough"..
cigarettes*
i don't mean "smoking them", i just mean standing outside in a place people are smoking.
but i do think it would be so fun to have something to do outside and a reason to ask handsome boys if you can "bum a cig" or whatever - i'm sure a lot of wrinkled couples have met that way.
Brunch*
(and/or going out to eat with a group of people in general)
What is the point of going to brunch? Not only do you never actually talk to all the people you are sitting with, but then you have to split a really big bill at the end - and of course there is always someone who is going to "forget" that order of "bruschetta" or whatever they ordered that you didn't even get a bite of, and then you're stuck handing over a $20 bill for a $5.95 bowl of black bean soup...
Okay, that's enough for this morning... Have a good day!
Friday, June 26, 2009
The Recession...
drives people to do crazy things...
I can't believe one of the Olsen twins modeled this slutty tanktop at the Dollar store..
and/or I can't believe how super funny the tanktop company is who photoshopped her head on it...
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Uncle Dirty Says...
In a relationship, the one who cares the least is in control...
We accept the love we think we deserve...
Guys will have sex with anything, look how many ugly people there are in the world
(i dont think this is true....oops NEVERMIND)
(these are tidbits of wisdom my dad has given to me, maybe they will help you too...)
We accept the love we think we deserve...
Guys will have sex with anything, look how many ugly people there are in the world
(i dont think this is true....oops NEVERMIND)
(these are tidbits of wisdom my dad has given to me, maybe they will help you too...)
If There Is Anything You Can Take From This...
It's the message contained in this video...
(thanks jeff)
PS THIS SONG MAKES ME EMOTIONAL - SERIOUSLY! I DON'T KNOW WHY! HAHA!
Turn My Swag On - Soulja Boy Tell`em
(thanks jeff)
PS THIS SONG MAKES ME EMOTIONAL - SERIOUSLY! I DON'T KNOW WHY! HAHA!
Turn My Swag On - Soulja Boy Tell`em
Monday, June 22, 2009
Worst Blow Up Dolls Ever Designed
Isn't it weird to think that everything in your room has been designed by someone?
All the objects you own started out as someone's dream,
and they believed in it enough to make it real.
Isn't that sort of inspiring?
It got me to thinking about blow up dolls!
Somewhere in the world, there is a boardroom of people discussing new blow-up doll designs!
There are probably even focus groups and blow up doll inspiration boards.
Anwho, I've compiled a list of the ugliest blow up dolls ever designed.
1) Worst Blow Up Doll #1All the objects you own started out as someone's dream,
and they believed in it enough to make it real.
Isn't that sort of inspiring?
It got me to thinking about blow up dolls!
Somewhere in the world, there is a boardroom of people discussing new blow-up doll designs!
There are probably even focus groups and blow up doll inspiration boards.
Anwho, I've compiled a list of the ugliest blow up dolls ever designed.
( The links below are not safe for work)
(UNLESS YOU WORK DESIGNING BLOW UP DOLLS TOO!)
(where is my mind today?)
(UNLESS YOU WORK DESIGNING BLOW UP DOLLS TOO!)
(where is my mind today?)
2) Worst Blow Up Doll #2
3) Worst Blow Up Doll #3
(is this supposed to be a middle age Italian woman?)
4) Worst Blow Up Doll #4
5) Worst Blow Up Doll #5 (kind of the best)
6) Worst Blow Up Doll # 6 - awkward!
7) Is this a child blow up doll?
If you haven't seen it yet, please watch Guys and Dolls. I love the black goth so much.
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